My Privileged Life

​As part of my continuing education as a white American and thus a beneficiary of systemic racism, I am reading a helpful, hard-hitting book by the mixed-race author-activist Ijeoma Oluo, So You Want to Talk about Race (Seal Press, 2019). In it she asks her readers, especially the white ones, to undertake a simple yet daunting task: To reflect on their privilege in 21st-century America. My list numbers 30 items and counting.

First, the big ones: I am a white, cis-gendered, heterosexual middle-class male. As a member of the white race, I am less likely to be stopped by police, followed around in stores, and suspected of having something bad in mind. I am also likely to find jobs more easily and be a salaried rather than an hourly worker. As a male, I live in a society where, as we used to say of the Soviet Union, all people are equal, but some are more equal than others. So, I am more likely to be a manager or CEO or an elected official and to be paid more than a female with similar qualifications for the same job. Being straight rather than gay, moreover, gives me a leg up in everything from hiring interviews to memberships in elite clubs. Finally, being middleclass suggests that I probably had the advantage of growing up in a nice neighbor, attending good schools, becoming a well-paid professional, and being able to give similar benefits to my own children.
           
​Besides such major privileges, many of us have numerous social advantages. Here are some of mine:

• I grew up in an intact family.
• I had loving, non-abusive parents who sacrificed to give me a better start in life than theirs.
• I had 15 years with an unconditionally loving “Black nanny,” whom I considered my spiritual mother.
• I spent my four high-school years at a private boarding school followed by four years at Yale, including a junior year at Heidelberg University, Germany, all paid for by my dad.
• I had wonderful mentors who believed in me and furthered me and my career.
• I was blessed with a high I.Q. and the example of hardworking parents and relatives.
• I also came equipped with a generally friendly, cheerful disposition.
• I have been spared up to now from having any physical or mental disabilities.
• I have been blessed by two supportive, harmonious spouses, my first wife having died after 43 years of marriage.
• I have never lacked for enough money to support myself or my family.
• I have been gifted with strong faith, a sense of humor, and a wide, diverse circle of friends.
• I have two healthy, well-adjusted, creative daughters, both happily married, both of whom still like me! And…
• I was born into American citizenship.

These are simply illustrative of the items in a longer list. Now what about you? What are your privileges in the school we call life? Are you willing to take a look?